Didn't think I'd be writing on here again so soon, but low and behold another fun packed disaster of a day. It started off fairly smoothly, I managed to avoid hawkesmore which was a positive, so true to form I needed two negatives just to restore the balance. I say two negatives, it was more like 10.
The first arrived with a much welcomed hour delay in yojakarta, which meant that by the time I landed in Jakarta my connection to singapore was due to leave in 14 minutes. I asked the stewardess the craic and she said they'd wait. What a fucking blatant shameless lie. I ran for the lionair desk to find out where I needed to go, and they told me it had already taken off, but, that I could make the next one in 1hr. The bloke told me to get the shuttle bus to terminal 3. When i got to T3 there was no flight to Singapore, so by this time I was perspiring quite heavily and my stress was being compounded by the fact that they said they'd get my rucksack put on that flight. The shitbag had told me the wrong terminal, and when I found my 3rd lionair desk of the day they said that I could still just about make it. Cue a fun shuttle bus journey around T1a, T1b, T1c and finally T2. The queue for security was massive, I wedged my way to the front but by the time I got to the gate it had closed, oh how I did laugh, I found the whole carry on just hilarious. So I had missed that flight and my rucksack was now off on it's merry way to Singapore, oh how I laughed, I mean I really found this whole episode really amusing, they are blameless of course, so I could see the funny side. What really made me chuckle was spending the next few hours imagining the controlled explosion of my rucksack, or some pikey just swiping it.
Good guys the chaps at lionair, they were fantastic. I have a lot of time for them. Their customer service is right up there with sky television, they're professional and they get the job done. If I could nominate an airline for airline of the year it would be lionair. They just get it right, they are there for you, if I could have my time again I'd move to indo and begin an apprenticeship with lionair, because those guys really are the elite of the aerospace world. I'd probably work for them for free, just so that I could get to see the feeling of satisfaction that they leave their customers with. They are the cremè de la cremè, I mean top marks to the boys in blue. If I get a book deal then it will be dedicated to my mum and the guys at lionair, because I owe them such a debt of gratitude for everything that they have done for me, for an afternoon they made me feel like a king amongst men. God bless you lionair, god bless you.
So they put my on a flight two hours later, which then got stuck on the Tarmac for another 45 minutes. When we took off I realised that I'd left my specs on the other flight so by this point I just wanted to find a tattoo parlour so that I could get the lionair emblem tattooed on my penis. We landed and I then had to go and try and locate my fooking rucksack, which took another hour or so. By this time it was already 11pm (I was due to be in my hostel by about 5pm). I was aware that the MRT transit system closed at 11.30 so I was in a rush. They scanned my bag and the security guy asked me if I had anything to declare, which had not happened before. I said no, and he asked me to cone with him, this was pretty unnerving. He took me to the customs room and asked me if I was carrying any cigarettes, and I said yes, but just the 400 like. So they got seized as there is no duty free here, there goes daddy's fathers day gift (of cancer).
So by the time this was done the MRT had finished and I had to get a lovely cheap taxi to sleepy sams hostel, where I stayed for my first nights travelling. Sleepy fucking sams is accurate, the shitbox was closed at midnight. I spent the hour and a half walking around with a backpack and 40+ increasingly agitated bites on my feet trying to find any hostel that was open, I mean it's a fucking major city on a Friday night and everywhere was locked up. I ventured into a couple of hotels that wanted £200, and I was seriously contemplating sleeping on the street. I was picturing the scene and it didn't appear that bad, I could have just sat outside the 7/11 drinking cans and plotting increasingly intricate plans to bring down lionair. I eventually found a dorm for £28, which is obscene but it's all I could find that was open. Tidy on a Friday.
At least tomorrow I have a relaxing 18hrs of flights with a nice soothing 6hr stop over in Riyadh, Saudi Arabia. I recall how welcoming the previous 2hr stop off was and I look forward o getting back there and watching inflight movies where even cleavage is blanket out. I hope these last few days don't taint my memories, although my memory is so bad I'll probably just forget the entire trip ever happened in a few months.
No comments:
Post a Comment